The Soap Box
A place for me to dump my brain and you to pick thru it

Brain No Want To Think
8:02pm

I'm taking this class about the history of psychology. So far, it's been like, "Aristotle lived from whatever to whatever and he wrote a book called 'Who Cares?'" Then on Thursday, we started talking about Kant and so of course my mind immediately starts singing:

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out-consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel,
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
There's nothing Nietzche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

And when my brain returned to the classroom, the instructor was discussing Kant's belief in apriori time-space transcendence or some such shit and I thought, Whoa! That's a big leap from Joe Schmoe wrote a book about crap to the freaking depths of time and space! I better start paying attention! Unfortunately, in the back of my head I kept hearing:

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable...

So now, of course, I really have NO idea what was discussed in class. But then again I'm not sure I'd know what was discussed even if I had paid attention!

The Rapture
3:40pm

I don't listen to country music...ever. But when I heard of the existence of this song, I had to check it out. It's called Honky Tonk Badonkadonk. Read the lyrics below:

Husslers shootin' eightball
Throwin' darts at the wall
Feelin' damn near 10 ft. tall
Here she comes, Lord help us all
Ol' T.W.'s girlfriend done slapped him outta his chair
Poor ole boy, it ain't his fault
It's so hard not to stare
At that honky tonk badonkadonk
Keepin' perfect rhythm
Make ya wanna swing along
Got it goin' on
Like Donkey Kong
And whoo-wee
Shut my mouth, slap your grandma
There outta be a law
Get the Sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how's she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk
(Aww son)
Now Honey, you can't blame her
For what her mama gave her
You ain't gotta hate her
For workin' that money-maker
Band shuts down at two
But we're hangin' out till three
We hate to see her go
But love to watch her leave
With that honky tonk badonkadonk
Keepin' perfect rhythm
Make ya wanna swing along
Got it goin' on
Like Donkey Kong
And whoo-wee
Shut my mouth, slap your grandma
There outta be a law
Get the Sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how's she even get them britches on
With that honky tonk badonkadonk
(Ooh, that's what I'm talkin' bout right there, honey)
We don't care bout the drinkin'
Barely listen to the band
Our hands, they start a shakin'
When she gets the urge to dance
Drivin' everybody crazy
You think you fell in love
Boys, you better keep your distance
You can look but you can't touch
That honkey tonk badonkadonk
Keepin' perfect rhythm
Make ya wanna swing along
Got it goin' on
Like Donkey Kong
And whoo-wee
Shut my mouth, slap your grandma
There outta be a law
Get the Sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how's she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk
That honky tonk badonkadonk
Yeah, that honky tonk badonkadonk

Between the melding of colloquialisms from both country and rap, comparing a woman to Donkey Kong, and lyrics telling you to slap your grandma, I am sure that this song is a clear sign that the rapture is just around the corner.

Seriously, Take Your Crazy Somewhere Else
9:12pm

New Mexico has long been the place you go when you're doing just crazy shit. Anyone remember the runaway bride? Well, today's story has to do with a woman from California who apparently stopped her car along the highway in New Mexico last night around 2:30am and decided she wanted to stargaze. For reasons still unknown, the woman stripped and lay down in a field where she fell asleep. Oh, did I mention that she had a 15 month old baby with her? And again, for reasons still unknown, the baby was naked too. Now, here's the problem. She fell asleep in the field, and when she woke up her baby was gone. At 8 am, she walked into a police station, still naked, and reported the child missing. Her car and her clothing were found by the side of the road and she's in the hospital...still changing her story as to exactly what happened. The police are more concerned with finding the baby (as they should be) than prying the truth out of the mother at this point. It really makes you wonder. For the official news story, click here.

UPDATED 4:33pm 9/26/07 - sadly, the child was found dead about an hour ago. No other details are currently available.

I'm Only Half A Genius
11:54pm

You Are 59% Tortured Genius

You are very smart and a little bit tortured. Like a tortured genius in training. You're brilliant enough to see how screwed up the world is. Just don't let it screw you up!

To My Friends on the East Coast...
7:35pm

...just so you know, I have NOT forgotten my roots!

Your Slanguage Profile

New England Slang: 100% Canadian Slang: 50% Aussie Slang: 25% British Slang: 25% Prison Slang: 25% Southern Slang: 25%

To My Friends on the East Coast...
11:37pm

...if you want to know what it looks like here in New Mexico, go see 3:10 to Yuma 'cause it looks just like that...'cause the film was shot here. But seriously, it looks like the opening scene all over the place. It's really beautiful. However, we do have real cities, not just wooden towns in the desert. And we have electricity and cars and stuff. And less gunfighting...I think. Hmmm...I probably shouldn't jump to that particular conclusion so fast...

More House-Mouse Stories
10:11am

So, I noticed yesterday that my cats were particularly interested in a heating vent in my house. Last night I got a flashlight and looked in the vent and sure enough, there was a mouse in it. Now, if anyone has ever had a mouse die in a heating vent, then you know what a lovely torture that is. I tried to get the mouse out but couldn't get it. I went to bed, thinking I'd deal with it later. Then, to my surprise, my husband informed me that Bodhi, our youngest kitten, not only caught the mouse (OK, a mouse) but he took it outside! Hooray! Double kitten crunchies for you Bodhi! You're my new hero!

This and That
11:59am

Yeah, I haven't be blogging. It's a direct reflection of how boring my life is lately. It's all school. school. school. This is how boring my life is: last night I dreamed I was playing Monopoly (not my favorite game) and I was losing. Think if all the things I could have been dreaming about and I dream that? My cat woke me up while I was dreaming this and I was grateful to leave the game, I was so bored.

Hey all you local people who read this, all one of you (Hi Betty). On October 13th, Albuquerque will be trying to break the record for the most people playing Smoke On The Watersimultaneously on guitar. Why? Eh, why the hell not? For more info, click here.

What's all this controversy regarding Kathy Griffin's Emmy comments? See folks, she's a comedian. She also grew up Catholic. She's making a joke. And I'd like to believe that Jesus can take a joke. Whatever.

Hey Texas! Stop hogging all the rain! Other people need it too! Just send it west and everything will be OK.

What We Have Here Is A Failure to Communicate
3:52pm

Dear Cats:

When I said you needed to earn your keep, I did not mean for you to bring mice INTO the house from outside then let them go. I want less mice in the house, not more. Now, please find the mouse you brought in last night before it dies in a heat vent!

Mom

Earn Your Keep, Dammit!
10:09pm

I have four cats...FOUR cats. And now I have a new pet...a mouse! I have a mouse in my kitchen and four cats in my house. How is this possible? When they are outside, they catch and eat mice, birds, lizards...you name it but get a mouse in the house and they all go on vacation. What's more worrisome is that mice here in new Mexico can carry the Hantavirus. So let's summarize...there is a mouse, possibly carrying the Hantavirus in my kitchen and my four cats could care less. What's wrong with this picture?

And speaking of pictures, here's proof of the mouse found in a kitchen drawer. Who knew mice liked gum?

Makes You Wonder
11:15pm

This is so very wrong.

Blog Name: The Soap Box
Email: jenben[at]g-r-c.com
Introduction

Jen's tattoos
Movies
Ways to waste time
Flash
Digital art
Poetry
Olympic pictures
Crafty things
Cats
Officiant

2007

2006

2005

2004

2003

2002

November
December

Blogroll Me!